Lots of chatcing up to do.

I have lots of blog catch up to play but I feel like if I don't blog about this feeling now I will forget and not have it to look back upon when I personally need it.


Personal Moment... now not so personal.

I woke up today not feeling that great. Went to the gym... felt worse (tummy bug? fever? anxiety?)... napped.. woke up feeling VERY ANXIOUS! Jed leaves to go get Cooper from school ... feel even more anxious... what the heck is this all about??? so frustrating.
** as this is going on Porter and Clara napping and then eating lunch (thanks to Jed). Keep this in mind Clara can get down from her chair all by herself, Porter cant.
I come up to my room to call Jed to tell me not to be anxious anymore and I am just sick and will be just fine. I hang up feeling a little better but not much. I pick up an Ensign (church magazine for anyone that may read this and not be LDS) I start thumbing through hoping to read something that will make me feel a little better. No specific inspiration sticks out so I start reading the visiting teaching message. It was great. Talked about how important our role is in families and communities. Started to feel better then....
You know the kid that cant get down from his chair by himself... loud crash... silence.... scream..... yep, mother of the year let her baby fall off his chair because I was having "a moment." I ran downstairs and grabbed him up and as I was holding him I started crying. Really... yes really I thought.
Then I realized with a prayer in my heart .... *hard to put into words, I will do my best* I am very important to my babies and they are thee MOST important possessions that I have and that I am a mother and a good one. Not perfect by any means but I will fall flat on my face... cry bc I am tired... laugh when things are too serious for me to handle..
BUT if I pray when I feel weak and unprepared to be the mother and wife I need to be or read scriptures to get inspiration it makes me feel better.
** Lesson of the day.... When things are at their daily worst ... say a little prayer.... it makes me feel better. I am grateful to have a Heavenly Father that loves me at my worst and best and shows me when I need it most.

Bipolar Weather

Yesterday we were outside until 7pm in jeans and t-shirts enjoying a nice evening playing tag, swinging, and riding the power wheels.

We wake up this morning to 1 inch of snow and it is still snowing at 1:30pm!!!

I over heard some people talking this morning while at the gym and this is NORMAL!!! WTH??? One old guy said its either windy or snowing... GGGRRREEEAAATTTT.....

Training Day

Went to the gym this morning and met with my trainer for the 1st time. I have to say that I am super excited to get my body in the shape that I know I can be in. 3 kids in less 6 years can take a toll on the good ol' body. We are officially done having babies and I am 29. I will not go into my 30's feeling bad about my body... it is going to be hard enough turning 30!!! I have no excuse to not get my butt in shape:)

The weigh in and measuring was a little rough... mentally. I was NOT excited to see the truth about my size but I know I will be excited to have those number go down.

Time to get this party started!!!

KISS IT

I have to keep telling myself to KISS IT!!

KEEP IT SIMPLE STUPID!!!

And this is when it comes to anything in my life lately... I am really good a complicating, well everything. I am really good at complicating marriage, raising my kiddos, and keeping a clean house. I have great intentions of making things less stressful for myself. I have made list after list, schedule after schedule and they all seem great in theory but when I am trying to follow that schedule I never make it and get even more frustrated with myself.

So this week my goal is to KISS it:)

Time to be less stressed and enjoy my kiddos and time here in Casper.

History....

So, we are outside playing in our backyard (it was 80+ degrees out yesterday:)) Our little old neighbors were out fixing the the fence and started talking to us about our house. I am SOOOO NOT IMPRESSED!! I am having a hard time liking this house anyway. The housing market here is AWFUL!!!! Next you will see the good and the bad about this house.

Good
we have a place to live
keeps the wind out
tire swing
space
backyard
garden

Bad
This house will not pass an inspection ...of any kind
A murderer once lived here after he got out of jail
A murder happened next door
Once a drug house
We are paying lots more then people before us

There is more but that was the scary stuff... Honestly, our house really isn't that bad and it is starting to feel like home. We moved into this house just to get to Casper and are looking for something else but there are not a lot of choices here. Not sure how I feel about knowing the history of this house. Creepy!!